Your heart or your head
I have always been a firm believer in the phrase “follow your heart”…until now. People who say this tend to act somewhat recklessly. They use this phrase to justify certain choices they have made. Choices that may not be all terrible, but more often than not they aren’t the best choices.
Let me start by saying that I don’t necessarily disagree with following your heart.
Your heart doesn’t always give bad advice. For instance, when it comes to following a dream, or falling in love your heart may be leading you in the right direction. However, you also need to use your head, as your heart isn’t always able to discern when a dream or a love interest is bad for you.
I have listened to my heart too many times it seems and too many times it has not led me where I should or needed to be.
It has caused more heartache and pain than I can put into words. Would I take any of it back? Absolutely not. I take everything I have experienced as a lesson. Some lessons were hard to learn and they took me places that yea, I would rather not have been. But, the truth is there has always been something for me to learn from every situation that I have had to endure.
Some people have looked at my choices as dumb. As I stated before, everything that has happened to me, good and bad is a lesson, so I can’t necessarily disagree with those who think that some of the choices I’ve made were not smart. I own what I have done.
No one is perfect.
I have let my heart guide me, when I should have listened to what my brain knew as wrong. It is VERY important to listen to what your head has to say about a particular person in your life. It may be telling you what you need to know regardless of what your heart has to say about it. Look for the red flags, they are often your brain’s way of exposing fact when your heart would rather have you live in fairy tale. Sometimes things are what they are and you should steer clear. The worst is getting involved with someone who you knew was bad from the start and then your feelings, or your heart, gets wrapped up in it. Before you know it you can’t help how you feel. When the reality is that your brain knew from the beginning and you could have saved yourself from the heartache had you simply listened to it instead of your heart. You can only blame yourself in that case because you followed your feelings rather than thinking things through thoroughly.
And no, you can’t ONLY listen to head. I’m not saying that either. Your head has a tendency to see only fact and it can steer you into places, people, or situations that while they seem good won’t make you happy in the end. For instance, a potential lover could look great on paper and you head says yes! This guy meets all the qualifications for you, but if you heart feels nothing than any relationship with that person is certain to fail. Sometimes listening to your head too much, or ALL the time can cause you to over think or over analyze things. Which is not good either.
There must be balance.
A healthy balance between the two is the best advice I can give to myself and to anyone else. Following your heart sounds awfully romantic but has proven to get me into trouble. Following only you head can cause you to be numb to feeling emotions. When your heart and your head can agree I can guarantee you are in the right place, or with the right person.