When to feel blessed…

It has been almost 11 years since I became a mother and sometimes when I look at the three little girls playing around in my living room I can’t even believe it.

I have three amazing little girls. There are times when I just watch them or look in on them when they are fast asleep and still can’t believe that I made them! Three little, although not so little anymore, babies came out of me! Its insane.

They drive me nuts. I can tell you that there probably hasn’t been a day where I haven’t yelled or where I haven’t lost my patience. There probably hasn’t been a day when I didn’t think to myself how is this possible? How am I going to keep on going? How am I going to raise these girls and be sure they will come out to be successful humans?

There are a lot of times I feel fear and worry and doubt my abilities completely and totally.

Which is why I have to stop what I’m doing, put my phone down, unplug, ignore the laundry (OK, this one happens a lot) and just focus on spending time with them. I must do this as often as possible. When older, wiser individuals tell you times flies, one day they are in your arms and the next day they are leaving for college, believe them.

Eleven years? How is it even possible I have been doing this motherhood thing for this long already?

So yes, in the chaos that is my life, where I’m constantly juggling two jobs, attempting this writing thing, making time for church, and trying to have a little bit of a social life, I have to unplug and stop and focus on the biggest reason why I do all that I do. My daughters. They are growing up in front of my eyes and I do not want to miss it. I want to take it all in and slow it down. I want to cherish all the little, crazy, beautiful, silly, loud moments there are.

When things are weighing heavy on me, and that could be anything that gets me down… money issues, dating trials or lack thereof, thinking about the future, or the fact that I’m their only parent… I have to remember just how blessed I am.

My daughters are above all, the greatest blessing I have been given. Its a monumental task to be a parent. And its such an important role to play. All the things you have to be for these kids: a mother, a coach, a disciplinary, a keeper of secret kissy faces, a referee –boy is this true of having three kids, someone they can trust, basically a hero. Its hard. We have to take this job, this blessing, serious.

Some people never get to be a parent, some only get to play a parenting role, some have lost their child… so whenever the stress of all you have to be feels almost unbearable just stop. Unwind and look into those beautiful faces of the little ones you created and trust me, you will feel all the feels. Let the worries melt away from you and take in that blessing.

Because while my job is to teach my little ones so much, don’t think I haven’t learned a thing or two myself from this parenting gig. They helped me and have given me so much I didn’t think possible. A love that knows no measure. For this I’m forever grateful. 🙂

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